Anger has been a common issue presented by those who are seeking counseling. From someone who has anger issues that are hard to control to someone who has fallen victim to another person’s fits of rage, is anger always bad, or is there something good that comes out of it? A man starts yelling in anger at others while stuck in traffic on his way home, and that can result in road rage. Usually, this man does not have episodes of anger outbursts, but on this day, he has a bad day at work with so much pressure crowding in from every side. His workday ends with a mouthful of angry and demeaning comments from his boss. Anger gets hold of him and goes out of control, and this leads to rage and violence. In another scene, close friends are having fun while hanging out. Their conversation leads to talk about funny memories, and they start making fun of each other. But at some point, some of the jokes become very offensive, and one of them becomes the butt of the jokes. The guy starts to grow quiet, trying to keep the hurt inside, but soon he can’t keep it hidden anymore. His facial expression starts to show anger, but the others continue with the teasing until he speaks up with a raised voice. He retorts, without lashing back with insults, to the recent joke about him, and he voices how offensive it is to him and how the jokes have gotten out of control. Because he shows his anger, his friends stop the hurtful jokes and apologize to him. He uses his anger to show that what is happening is not right.
God gave us emotions for our benefit, but that does not mean we should express them carelessly. Emotions are gifts, but they must be handled in a healthy way. The Bible teaches us that we can be angry, but we must not allow our anger to lead to sin (Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: Ephesians 4:26).
A Prayer Against Anger
Emotions are part of how we as human beings communicate. We communicate not just with words but also in non-verbal ways, such as through emotions. Our emotions serve as indicators or warning signals to others and to ourselves. Often emotions are regarded as negative or positive due to their usual effects and consequences. As with joy, for example—we see it as something very positive because of how pleasant it is. Who does not want to be joyful or see someone filled with much happiness? On the other hand, we see sadness as negative due to how unpleasant its effect is on people. We see emotions from a very polarized perspective, but if we understand the purpose of emotions, they are actually neutral in nature. Emotions only become bad when we allow them to be expressed in a sinful way. Even joy can have a negative effect, such as when a person’s joy is relished without regard for other people’s welfare. For instance, it might be that a standup comedian finds much joy and amusement in his craft but, sadly, his jokes have been capitalizing on lewd comments and stories that are demeaning to others for the sake of humor.
All other emotions can have good or bad effects, depending upon how we handle them. Anger is not a sinful emotion and can be expressed for righteousness if handled right. All emotions have the capacity for both good and evil; it is determined by the motive and the application that follows.
A law enforcer on patrol sees someone being threatened or robbed in the streets. It is expected that he expresses anger in the presence of injustice as he responds to the crime, and he may even have to use force to uphold the law and protect the innocent. Another example is a woman being harassed by a cab driver. As the cab driver makes his advance on her, she cannot stay passive while being molested but must show anger as she protests the wrong being done. There are circumstances when expressing anger is much needed. Anger allows us to communicate emphasis on certain immediate needs, especially regarding offenses. Our anger signals people to back off or to stop because a right has been violated. It gives people the obvious hint that boundaries are to be respected.
What if we had no anger? If that were so, then there would be much injustice and oppression because no one would be able to respond to wrongdoing accordingly or stand against it in anger. Crimes would be treated as something very trivial, and that would bring about chaos. Anger is necessary in the face of evil. In fact, as Christians, we should be angry at sin. We can be angry, but for the right reasons and in the right way. Even Jesus showed great anger.
- John 2:13-17 KJV
When it was time for the celebration of the Jewish Passover, Jesus went up to Jerusalem and entered the temple. He saw that instead of genuine worship, people were taking advantage of the celebration and turning it into a business opportunity. It made the offering and purchase of sacrificial animals hard for the poor because the sellers and money changers were charging excessively. To Jesus, this desecration of worship to the Father could not be allowed to continue. He responded in anger and was even somewhat violent. He made a whip to scourge the traders and animals to chase them out of the temple, and He even overturned the tables used for their business transactions. Jesus was angry for the right reason, though the people did not understand it since they were all so used to the system. His righteous anger was justified even if other people did not agree with Him.
Jesus’s anger demonstrated his passion to please God the Father and uphold His precepts above all, even if He had to go against other people’s interests. But to be clear, this does not mean that we should always respond to wrong in the way that Jesus did at the temple. We must consider the proper context. There must be wisdom and proper discretion in addressing the sins of others. We speak the truth in love. But with Jesus here, it is different. Any sin is due for God’s wrath, but Jesus chose to be angry in that way rather than pour out God’s wrath upon them all. But even His anger showed grace. In the time of Moses, God opened up the earth for the rebellious leaders and their families to be swallowed alive (Numbers 16). God even destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah with fire and brimstone from heaven because of their wickedness (Genesis 19). God should have often allowed His anger to annihilate us all, but He chose to be patient and extend grace to us even when we continued in sin.
We have to be reminded that when it comes to sin, we must never take it lightly. If sin causes God to be angry, we must see it that way also. There has to be righteous indignation in our battle against sin, but our anger must be channeled at sin, satan, and his demons. For our struggle is not against our fellow men but against the dark forces in the spiritual realm, the ones that cause spiritual chaos and instigation of sin in the world ( For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. Ephesians 6:12). Our anger and hatred must be directed at sin, not people.
A Prayer Against Anger
If God is always righteous when He acts in anger, it is not the same with humans. Due to our fallen nature, it is very difficult to manage anger without sinning. When our anger is left unchecked, it can cause much destruction to us and other people, especially when motivated by pride, hatred, bitterness, greed, or envy. When Saul became jealous of David’s success and fame and was compared, this made him so angry. In a sudden outburst, he hurled a spear at David with the intent to kill, but fortunately David was able to escape twice. Saul’s anger was motivated by envy, and he allowed it to progress into a murderous heart and actions (2 Samuel 18). Even when injustice is prevalent, we cannot just take justice into our own hands and bypass the law of the land and corresponding authorities. When anger is coupled with revenge, it can cloud one’s judgement and lead to a regrettable outcome. We must understand and remember what the Bible teaches about vengeance. In ( Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord. Romans 12:19), Paul tells us not to avenge ourselves when offended but leave it to God. Only God has the right to avenge injustice. What we can do is trust God’s perfect judgment and allow Him to address it in His way, not ours.
A Prayer Against Anger
When anger gets out of control, it can destroy properties, lives, and relationships. That must be prevented from happening. The Bible teaches us how to deal with anger problems, but we must be ready to embrace biblical truths even if it is not convenient. Scripture tells us that we must learn to bear with one another and choose to be patient, especially when we know that we have less control of our anger. We must forgive even as Christ forgave us of all our sins (Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye. Colossians 3:13) and also be humble enough to ask for forgiveness when we have offended others.
A Prayer Against Anger
We can also choose to respond with kindness instead of retaliating out of anger. We can learn to put our anger aside and do the right thing. Scripture tells us to treat our enemies with kindness despite how much they provoke us to anger. As we do that, we are causing them to wonder about their mistreatment in the hope that their hardness of heart will melt away.
Though there are ways to address our anger, the power of will is not enough. Personal resolutions can be set aside in the heat of the moment. Many times, it can be frustrating how easily we lose control of our anger. That is why we need the help of the Holy Spirit. In Galatians 5:22-26, we learn that if we have the Holy Spirit in us, He produces fruits in us that empower us to be loving, patient, peaceful, gentle, and have self-control. We must allow the Holy Spirit to guide us in how we manage our emotions and learn to be submissive to His voice. The Holy Spirit changes our hearts. It may not be instantaneous and may take a while, but we must trust the work of God in us. We must not tolerate bitterness, rage, unhealthy anger, harsh words, evil talk, and any type of evil behavior, for these can also grieve the Holy Spirit (Ephesians 4:30-31).
- Titus 2:11-14 KJV
We should live right before God since we are recipients of God’s forgiveness, which saves us all. His grace teaches and empowers us to say “No” to sin and the temptations of the world. God’s work in us allows us to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives while we are waiting for the coming of our great God and Savior Jesus Christ. Christ and His sacrifice free us from the bondage of sin, making us pure and giving us the hope and will to do good.
As we hope to overcome anger, we must learn to depend upon God in prayer. There are times when the battle against toxic and unhealthy anger becomes discouraging when it seems like nothing’s happening. Each time you feel like you have a breakthrough, an episode of outburst suddenly happens, and it makes you feel like you are back to square one. Do not fret but persevere in prayer (Rejoice evermore.Pray without ceasing. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-17) and actively and intentionally address anger issues. Trust that God is able to change our hearts and that, someday, breakthrough will come.
A Prayer Against Anger
There was a Christian wife who had a problem with her husband’s angry outbursts and occasional violence, especially when he came home drunk. She had been a strong Christian, but her marriage was suffering due to the husband’s anger issues. She had tried confronting him about it, threatening to leave with the kids, and even reporting him to the police. She loved her husband and did not want the kids to be living in a toxic family environment, but she feared that things could get out of control someday. She contemplated ending the marriage, but the Holy Spirit spurred her to pray for her husband. Each night, while her husband was asleep, she sat beside him and laid her hands on him to pray and declare breakthrough. Not only that, but she chose to serve him despite how bad his attitude became. After a few months, one night, the husband suddenly woke up. He suddenly had the desire to go to church. So, he asked his wife to bring him to her church. She did, and her husband got connected to people in church, was ministered to, repented, asked forgiveness from his family, received Jesus as Lord and Savior, and committed to living a life that honors God.
Nothing is impossible for God. We may give up on people or ourselves, but God does not. We may not have the power to change people and may even try to compel others to change, but only God can turn a heart of stone into a heart of flesh. We just need to trust that He will.
“Lord, I am sorry that I often give in to my anger. I know it hurts others, and it dishonors You. I don’t want to keep on responding in rage but most of the time, it is hard to control. I have been sick and tired, and frustrated with myself. Lord, please help me overcome this anger issue. You know that I cannot beat this on my own. I want to surrender it all to You and trust that You will give me the breakthrough that I need. Each time I’m about to explode in anger, Holy Spirit, please calm my soul and allow patience and self-control to bear fruit in me. Lord, I lay this burden at Your feet and trust in Your goodness. I declare that this struggle will be turned into a testimony that will bring You glory. Thank You, Lord. All these I ask and claim in the name of Jesus Christ! Amen!”