A Grief Prayer

Grief is, sadly, one of the things that a person must encounter at some point in his or her life. There are varying degrees of grief that a person may experience, depending on one’s particular circumstance. A person who has just lost their job may experience grief but won’t be all that devastated, while a man who just lost his wife may be in a great deal of pain over the loss of the love of his life. Indeed, what you mourn in times of grief is the loss, but you are also grieving and trying to come to terms with the resulting transition. For example, a person who has spent years in a particular place and built great relationships with the people there may grieve as he or she needs to move to another place. The same applies to a person adjusting to a life without their spouse or to an employee who has to face tomorrow without a job. However, we can rest assured that in times of grief, we are not alone. Just as we can never flee from God’s presence, we know God is with us (Psalm 139:7-10).

Heavenly Father, I thank You because even in times of grief, I know You are always with me and will never forsake me. Even when I find myself in a dark valley, Your rod and staff comfort me, for You are my shepherd Who leads me even in dark seasons. You are always faithful, and Your love is steadfast. In Jesus’ name, I pray. Amen.

What Does the Bible Say About Praying in Times of Grief?

When you find yourself grieving, remember that God is your heavenly Father. That means you come before God on His throne of grace (Hebrews 4:16  Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.), not to impress Him with how you pray even in your grief, but rather to run toward Him. It is not about the eloquence of your words or the knowledge you have of what you should be praying for. Rather, it is about coming toward God, your refuge and fortress, in trust (Psalm 46:1-3).

When we are grieving, we are so overwhelmed with our emotions and pain that often we don’t even know what to pray for. Know that even in such times – even if your prayer to God is as simple as “LORD, help and comfort me” or “Father, I don’t know what to say” – God surely understands you. Psalm 139:1-6 shows us how much God, in His omniscience, knows about us. Even before a word is on our tongue, He already knows it. He knows when we lie down and when we rise up. He knows everything about us that there is a need to know. That is why, when we pray to God, it is more of an act of depending on Him rather than informing Him of our needs, for there is nothing that God does not know and understand about us.

Also, the book of Psalms shows us that in times of grief, we can be honest with God and pour our hearts out. Sometimes, we think that in times of difficulty, we are to pray somewhere along the lines of “LORD, I can overcome this through Christ Who strengthens me” or “I trust You, God. I know that all things work for my good.” While indeed those are truths, and we should pray with them, we don’t have to bypass the emotions that we feel as we grieve our loss. The book of Psalms shows David is being honest with God regarding what he feels about his circumstances, and he even asks God some hard questions (Psalm 6:6 I am weary with my groaning; all the night make I my bed to swim; I water my couch with my tears.)(Psalm 13:1-2)(Psalm 22:1-2)(Psalm 88:13-14)(Psalm 102:1-2).

Remember that God is our heavenly Father. Any good father would like their child to pour out their emotions to them, just as we sometimes open up to our friends about what we are going through. We all have to grieve properly and process our emotions, and we can start by being honest with God and asking Him the hard questions such as “Why?”

How Do I Pray When Grieving?

In line with what we have mentioned above, you can pray in times of grieving by coming to God in prayer and being honest with Him. Pour out what you want to pour out to God; express your pain, distress, and loss to Him. Ask Him the hard questions. Wrestle with and lament to God just as King David did. However, it is essential to note that we do this not out of familiarity with God but with respect and reverence for Him.

However, while we should lament and be honest with God in prayers as we grieve, we don’t stop there. If we observe David’s prayers in the book of Psalms, we see that even if he begins with lamentations toward God, he always ends by going back to Who God is (Psalm 6:9)(Psalm 13:5-6)(Psalm 22:25-31)(Psalm 102:12-28). David remembers God’s glory and that He is the One enthroned. He hears the cries of the afflicted and does not hide His face from them. David trusts in the steadfast love of the LORD and sings praises, for God deals bountifully with him. In other words, even amid our grief, we magnify God all the more because He is light to our sorrows.

Heavenly Father, You know the loss that I am grieving right now—a loss in which hopes and dreams have been shattered. Because of the pain, I don’t know how to articulate my emotions. But I know that You know my heart behind everything. I wonder why things couldn’t be how I hoped, but in the end, I know that Your ways are just and that You are holy. Even if I walk in a dark valley, You can be trusted. You are perfect in all of Your ways. Everything works together for the good of those who love You. In Jesus’ name, I pray. Amen.

Remember that you are not bearing things alone when you find yourself in a dark valley, as shown in (Psalm 23:4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.). God is with You. Psalm 23:6 tells us that even in that dark valley, God’s goodness and loving kindness will follow us all the days of our lives. Last, may this season be the time you behold Christ, Who takes your yoke upon Himself and is gentle (Matthew 11:29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.). Christ knows what it is to be human and can empathize with our weaknesses (Hebrews 4:14-16). In Him, we receive grace and mercy as we persevere in our Christian journey.