A Prayer About Kindness

With the worldwide influence and impact of social media, we now see people living other lives in the digital world. On different social media platforms, we find different kinds of interactions. There are people posting blogs, pictures, videos, and many others. Regular people can now find instant fame and quickly gain huge followings of fans. However, with many worldwide fans showing so much interest, it’s not hard to also find haters. Viewers commonly criticize online celebrities, whether their posts are about fashion, education, lifestyle, finance, product reviews, religion, or anything else. No matter what kind of content or persona is being shown, you can usually find other people leaving nasty comments. Some are cerebral, some are emotional, and some are made purely out of spite. We find bullying happening not just in the physical world but also as a plague in the digital world. Mean words cannot be taken lightly. We hear the idiom, “Sticks and stones can break your bones, but words can never hurt you.” Sadly, the reality is that words do hurt—deeply. Emotional abuse can be very damaging to a person’s psyche and must not be underestimated. When we’re watching our favorite sports and see mistakes or unfairness, do we resort to rude comments? When your spouse forgets your wedding anniversary, do you throw insults at them out of frustration? When an employee’s assigned job falls short of expectations, do you lambast the person’s mental capacity? We live in a world where people can be incredibly harsh to each other physically, mentally, or emotionally. How should a Christian respond when confronted with cruelty? Should we respond in kind? 

As disciples of Christ, we are called not to respond in kind but with kindness. Jesus teaches us to love our enemies and do good to them. We must show kindness, even to those who are not kind to us, just as God is kind to us, even though we are rebellious and ungrateful (Luke 6:35-36).

True Christian kindness is indeed out of this world. As we reflect the kindness of God, it allows us to go beyond the moral capacity of the flesh. However, if you think about it, human philosophies also teach kindness in different ways. What makes the kindness of Christ different from the “wise men” of the world?

Famous teachings about kindness from other worldviews teach everyone not to hurt or cause pain to others. Such a philosophy is truly reasonable, but it pales in comparison to the kindness that Jesus advocates. Jesus’ Golden Rule teaches us to do unto others whatever you want others to also do unto you (Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets. Matthew 7:12). So, what’s the difference? We will talk about the difference in four points in the hopes that we will see the kindness of God in a better light that compels us to act accordingly.

1. Proactive, not just merely passive

We see the biggest difference in how it is stated. While the world’s wisdom teaches us to be passive (do not do), Jesus tells us to be proactive (do) by showing kindness. The kindness of God’s people does not wait for an opportunity to do good but actively seeks to love and do good unto others. 

We often hear the phrase, “It’s the thought that counts.” That suggests that one’s good intentions are more important than one’s actions. Does that always apply?

Take the example of a Christian, while on the bus, who happened to overhear a bus conductor’s sad conversation with another person. Apparently, he got short-changed by a passenger by a significant amount and had to pay for the difference with His salary. What makes it worse is that he needed that money since his wife was about to give birth very soon. The Christian took pity and silently prayed for the bus driver, but God showed him a picture of money as he closed his eyes to pray. The next thing he saw was that the money actually came from his own wallet. God was telling him not just to pray but to be the answer to that prayer by giving away all the money he had in his wallet. It was a struggle, but he decided to obey and gave everything he had to the bus driver. He was called by God to love not just in thoughtful prayer but to be proactive and act upon it.

Even in the pursuit of peace, Christ preaches that we are blessed when we are peacemakers (Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God. Matthew 5:9). We are not merely peacekeepers passively trying to maintain peace. We are the ones who initiate and propagate peace, even in the midst of hostility. Christians actively love and show kindness to others. As God’s people, He has called us to be the “salt and light” of the earth (Matthew 5:13-16). We must clothe ourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience (Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering; Colossians 3:12).

 

2. Sacrificial, not just reciprocal

Oftentimes, we only show kindness to those who are kind to us. As we do good and give favor to others, we expect reciprocation. The act of kindness turns into a debt of gratitude that encourages people to do the same for us. However, Jesus takes kindness to another level, even to the point of sacrifice. The kindness that Jesus teaches consists of giving without expecting anything in return, to love not just people who can reciprocate but also those who cannot. It teaches us to be kind even to those who are unkind to us and to bless even those who are undeserving. This type of love and kindness is deeply reflective of the sacrificial love from our Lord Jesus Christ.

• Luke 6:27-36 KJV 

To those who are willing to learn, Jesus tells us to love our enemies and do good even to those who hate us. We must pray and bless those who wish bad things to happen to us, regardless of how harshly they may treat us. People may be mean to us and throw insults at us, but we must be ready to endure those insults without retaliation, as we should simply turn the other cheek. As disciples of Christ, we do not love like the world does; we love like Christ loved us—unconditionally and sacrificially. As we dispense the kindness of Christ to people who are undeserving, we expect nothing in return. We may not receive the reward that we expect from people, but God’s reward for us is greater. We have always been undeserving of His love and kindness, but we are deserving of His justice and wrath. Thus, we demonstrate His powerful kindness as we have received unmerited kindness from God Our Father.

3. Spirit-empowered, not will-powered

The level of kindness that Jesus expects from His people is difficult to achieve and may seem impossible even. Man may have the capacity to show great kindness, but sadly we also have the capacity to inflict great cruelty. This is because of our sinful nature, the inherent inclination we have to do what is evil, which creates a struggle from within (And God saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every imagination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually. Genesis 6:5, Romans 7:14-25). To be kind like Jesus takes more than just willpower.

The good news for Christians is that we have the Holy Spirit to empower us to do good works. The Holy Spirit reminds and helps us to be kind, even to those who hurt us. He guides us in how we live our lives, empowering us to say ‘No’ to the cravings of our sinful nature. When we allow our lives to be directed by the Holy Spirit, we are able to overcome the power of sin that compels us to do evil, and we are then empowered to do what is good (Galatians 5:16-18). The Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control ( But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law. Galatians 5:22-23). The good news is that these are not based on our capacity to do good; becoming kind is the fruit of the Spirit, not ours. If we rely on our willpower to be kind, we will often fail, but if we rely on the Holy Spirit, He is the one who produces this fruit in our hearts and in our actions.

A teenage boy grew up with so much hatred for his abusive father that he began to study different martial arts. He had plans to beat up his father someday, to get back at him, but in college he encountered the Gospel and was saved. Part of his journey into a spirit-empowered life was to forgive his dad, and with much struggle, the Holy Spirit empowered him to forgive and even reach out to his dad. Everything went well in his relationship with his dad, though the dad still retained his usual character. However, there was one time that the teenage boy got into an argument with his father, and it got so heated that his dad pulled a knife on his son. At that point, the boy was already highly trained in different martial arts and was able to stop his father’s attempt to hurt him with the knife. Pinned to the wall, the father was powerless against his son. That was the opportunity for the son to get back at his dad after so many years of training, but the Holy Spirit began to move in his heart and prompted him to respond with kindness. The son did not want to hurt his father and could not even imagine hitting him back. He told his dad that despite how he had been treated, he still chose to react with respect. From that tight restraining grip, it turned into a hug, and forgiveness was released. The Holy Spirit had already changed the teenage boy’s heart and enabled him to be kind, even if his father was not kind to him.

Now, that is the power of the fruit of the Holy Spirit! It is the power to be supernaturally kind, even to those who mean to do us evil.

4. God-centered, not self-centered

Christian kindness is very different from humanitarian kindness because it is proactive, sacrificial, and Spirit-empowered. However, most importantly, it is not centered on our character. It does not depend on the good that we have done or our capacity to be kind but upon the natural benevolent character of God. Understanding and acknowledging this makes us humble. It makes us realize and see the true condition of the human heart. In Psalm 51, King David acknowledged this and humbled himself before God. When he had committed adultery, which led to murder, he repented before God and admitted his sinful condition. He accepted that he was sinful, even at birth, and that he badly needed God. A transformation of our character only happens when we repent before God and embrace His salvation and Lordship (Romans 10:9-10). If we do that, we have shifted from a self-centered perspective of kindness into one that revolves and depends upon the goodness of God. It is no longer who you are but who God is. We are able to show kindness because God was kind to us first. 

No one has demonstrated kindness better than God. After man sinned in the Garden of Eden, God was still kind to Adam and Eve, despite their disobedience. He did not allow man to live in the nakedness of shame, but he made garments of skin to cover us ( Unto Adam also and to his wife did the Lord God make coats of skins, and clothed them. Genesis 3:21). His loving kindness made Him appear and rescue us from the powerlessness of being in bondage to sin (Titus 3:4-5), not on the basis of good things we had done. His kindness also allows us to be led to repentance (Or despisest thou the riches of his goodness and forbearance and longsuffering; not knowing that the goodness of God leadeth thee to repentance? Romans 2:4). You can see that in Psalm 23, where His kindness is like that of a shepherd. He gives provision for all our needs, leads us into a life of peace, despite our troubles, restores our strength, and comforts us even in the presence of danger. The kindness of the Great Shepherd treats us gently, like a lamb. He carries us in His arms and holds us close to His heart ( Withhold not thou thy tender mercies from me, O Lord: let thy lovingkindness and thy truth continually preserve me. Psalm 40:11). His lovingkindness is so awesome that despite how we disobey and disrespect Him with sin and rebellion, He still treats us with kindness. Knowing His character inspires us to treat others with kindness too, even those who are not good to us.

• Galatians 6:9-10 KJV 

We must not grow tired of doing what is good before God, for at the right time, we will receive our great reward from Him. So, whenever we have the opportunity to be kind to anyone, we must act upon it. We must be kind because our Father in heaven is kind.

As we pray for kindness, we must always remember all of the above. We must rely upon God for kindness to manifest in our lives and ask Him to move in our thoughts, desires, and actions. Pray for the Holy Spirit to do His work in your life and change you from your inner life to your outer life. Ask Him to fill you with kindness that overflows towards others.

Dear Lord, you know what is in my heart. You know that many times, I don’t respond with kindness and love. Please move in my heart and my thoughts and enable me to go beyond myself and bear the fruit of the Spirit—kindness. Help me to endure cruelty and persecution from others, and may I not retaliate but leave justice in your hands. Lord, may I not be passive in doing good to others, but help me to proactively seek opportunities to be kind to others. Thank you for always being so kind to me, even when I have been rebellious to you. May I reflect that to others so that I may bring glory to your name. Change my heart, Lord, and make it submissive to you in everything that I do. Fill my life with your love and let it overflow to others. In Jesus’ name, I pray. Amen!